Dishwasher, you are dead to me

I gave you fifteen plates to wash, and you cleaned only two.

I gave you six bowls to wash, and you cleaned only one.

I gave you three coffee mugs to wash, and you left coffee stains in them all.

Dishwasher, why do you make me so sad?

I give you water and electricity.  I give you detergent and JetDry.  I give you dishes to keep you company every day.  I ask for so little in return

I only make you work twice a week.

And yet you let me down.  You do not clean the dishes.  In fact, you bake the food remnants on the dirty dishes so they are even harder to clean.  You leave detergent residue on your door.  You laugh at me when I take the dishes out, and I hear you giggle as I re-wash them by hand.

Dishwasher, I do not love you anymore.

It’s not me, it’s you.

Soon, I will find a newer, better dishwasher, and you will leave my home.  We will not invite you back for birthdays or holidays.  You will not see my Christmas dishes again.  You will not get to clean my oatmeal bowls or my coffee mugs.  And I will not miss you.  I will love the new dishwasher more than I ever loved you.

Dishwasher, you are dead to me.


16 Responses to Dishwasher, you are dead to me

  1. Justin says:

    You can go all Office Space on it! 🙂

  2. carla says:

    You are too funny!!! Looks just like the dishwasher we had to get rid of several months ago! I do love my new one though! It’s amazing how much better of a job it does.

  3. dibble says:

    I think your dishwasher has been talking to mine. I’ve taken it apart twice now to find why it makes me sad, and still it refuses to clean.

    I’m going to have to instate a strict no communication policy between our appliances.

    • There’s a dishwasher bug going around – it’s not just you and me! By the way, how is your microwave? Mine is acting up…

      • dibble says:

        My god ! I hope you just did not jinx my microwave . . . it’s brandy new !!

        If it starts to get sick, I’ll know who to blame.

        *eyes you suspiciously*

  4. Andy says:

    One word….Miele.

  5. G says:

    You have a bad track record with dishwashers. The one you left here works about as good as the one you currently despise 🙂

  6. Katie O. says:

    Hey! I keep seeing your blog on all of the “Indiana Farm Girls” blogs that I am following, so I thought I better come check you out! You haven’t disappointed me!

  7. Cris says:

    Woman, I feel your pain. So glad the hubby got me a Pool Boy for Mother’s Day.

  8. Heather says:

    You told that dishwasher!!!!

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